The Big Bash

My last night out in the big city and I go party hopping around town, allocating all of my funds to taxi's instead of booze, because obviously everyone should just be feeding me alcohol all night.

Party #1

I walk the six blocks from my apartment in super high heels, I am walking up to an apartment building and there are tons of people on a balcony. Of course thats where I am headed, and they look pretty promising, even from seven stories below. I only know two people there, so this is kind of my opportunity to meet people. However, it didn't take long for me to notice that as attractive as some of them are, all of them are from the suburbs. This makes networking pretty much useless. I flirted with this guy (with a bag of wine he had taken out of the box) forever just to find out that he was from the other side of the country! Useless! So I left. Maybe that was a bad idea.

Party #2

Also filled with people I didn't know, but this time it was more on the homosexual side. Which is fine. I met some guy who had a fun accent so we talked to each other in opposite accents. British people have terrible Canadian accents. There I had some amazing shots, not to sure what was in them, but they were a nice shade of peach and they were bubbly, so I had a few. I find out that one of my professors may have hooked up with on of his students! So scandalous and wrong. I want in on that action.

Party #3

I pull up in a cab to house surrounded by a mass of people. Meet up with some friends, one who was at party #1. By this point I really have very little recollection of what happened. I stood out side, talked to some people, took to some pictures, talked to some guy with a beard. Beard's name was Ross, I am pretty sure he had to ask one of my friends what my name was. This was after I started making out with him because he was boring. Some guy beside us exclaimed "thats so romantic!" so I had to stop. Because obviously it wasn't romantic at all. At this point I had lost my friends and they came back and we head off to the park. I don't want Beard around, but he just decides it's good to follow along, maybe because there was a bag of shrooms. So me on the park bench filled with boys. I don't want to toot my own horn, but every guy on that bench wanted in my pants. One was my hook up buddy, hie best friend had told him he wanted to hook up with me before his friend did, I had just made out with Beard and the last one kept on giving me hugs and saying "I am going to mis you so much" while digging his face into my neck and kissing me a little too friendly like...

How do I choose between all these winners? Well since they were all tripping on shrooms I had the pleasure of taking the neck kisser home. I call his sexy cousin to come down to the lobby of their apartment and pick this mess of a man. Should have gone up with his cousin, the only one that wasn't shit faced and when I gave him a hug I got the sense that he had a pretty nice chest underneath that shirt.

Good bye big city and hello simple small town boys!